Where is the passion that I needed the most?

Where is the passion that I needed the most?
A modified line from Daniel Powter's song, Bad day..

I always say that I love teaching, that is my passion. I want to teach this, that, that, and that.
But, when the time comes.. when I have a chance to teach.. the passion is just gone away.

Isn't this the moment that I have waited for long?
Do I have so much fear?
Why do I should be fear?

This thought that came:
They won't care anyway.. This effort would be a waste.

Why this kind of negative thought came?

Why can't I put a little faith on it?
Am I losing faith?

I worked too hard.. and I don't want my work hard to become waste.
I have to be strong.

God, now I know why You gave me this headache.
To make me stronger, reminding me not to rely on my strength but to Yours.
It's hard God.. really hard.. 

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